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Teacher's Guide to RSD

12 min read

Students with rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD) can be among your most challenging - and most rewarding - to teach. This guide helps you understand what's happening in their minds and how to support them effectively.

What Is RSD?

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria is an intense emotional response to perceived rejection, criticism, or failure. It's particularly common in students with ADHD, affecting an estimated 99% of them.

The emotional pain is real and physical, not exaggerated
Responses are involuntary - students can't just "get over it"
It happens instantly, often before conscious thought
It's triggered by perceived rejection, not just actual rejection
It can last from minutes to hours

What RSD Feels Like

"Imagine the most embarrassed or ashamed you've ever felt. Now imagine that feeling hitting you at full intensity, without warning, multiple times a day - sometimes from a casual comment or a look you might have misinterpreted."

How RSD Appears in the Classroom

The Explosive Response

Some students react outwardly:

  • Sudden anger or tearful outbursts
  • Arguing or becoming defensive
  • Shutting down and refusing to participate
  • Walking out of class
  • Saying things they don't mean

The Implosive Response

Others turn inward:

  • Going quiet and withdrawing
  • Looking "checked out" or distant
  • Excessive apologising
  • People-pleasing behaviours
  • Self-deprecating comments

Avoidance Behaviours

Many try to prevent triggers:

  • Refusing to answer questions
  • Not submitting work (fear of criticism)
  • Avoiding group work
  • Skipping classes or school
  • Procrastinating to avoid failure

Common Misinterpretations

Teachers often misread RSD behaviours as:

"Overreacting"

It's not drama; the pain is real

"Manipulation"

They're not trying to control you

"Defiance"

They're often too overwhelmed to comply

"Not caring"

They often care too much, which is the problem

"Laziness"

Avoidance is usually fear-driven

Common Triggers in School

Being corrected publicly
Grades and harsh feedback
Being called on unexpectedly
Not being picked for groups
Competitive activities
Harsh tone of voice
Comparisons to others
Surprise tests or changes

Strategies That Help

How You Deliver Feedback

  • Private, not public

    Take them aside for corrections

  • Written first

    Give time to process before discussing

  • Specific and behavioural

    "This paragraph needs more evidence"

  • Lead with connection

    "I can see you worked hard..."

  • End with reassurance

    "I know you can do this"

Classroom Environment

  • Warn them before calling on them
  • Offer opt-out options for presentations
  • Create predictable routines
  • Avoid public ranking or competition
  • Have a signal system for breaks

Building Relationship

  • Get to know them outside of academics
  • Notice and comment on their strengths
  • Be consistent and predictable
  • Repair promptly when things go wrong
  • Don't take their reactions personally

The Feedback Sandwich

1
"I can see you put effort into this..."
2
"One thing that would strengthen it..."
3
"Here's how to improve it. I'm here to help."

When a Student Is Triggered

In the Moment

  1. 1Don't escalate - stay calm, lower your voice
  2. 2Don't reason - their thinking brain is offline
  3. 3Create space - "Would you like to step outside?"
  4. 4Avoid audience - move others' attention away
  5. 5Give time - don't demand immediate compliance

After They've Calmed Down

  • Check in privately
  • Don't lecture or rehash what happened
  • Focus on repair and moving forward
  • Reassure them the relationship is intact
  • Help them plan for next time if appropriate

Working with Parents

Share your observations - parents often know about RSD at home but not school
Ask what works - they know their child's triggers and strategies
Coordinate approaches - consistency helps
Communicate positives - not every contact should be about problems

Remember

It's not about you - their reactions aren't personal
You can't fix everything - small consistent support matters
Seek support from colleagues and specialists
Celebrate small wins - progress may be gradual

Students with RSD often become your most loyal and appreciative students once they feel safe with you. Your understanding can be transformative. They don't need you to lower standards - they need you to deliver feedback in ways their nervous system can handle.